bisexualpiratequeen:

I’m trying hard to live by Cat Principles.

1- I am glorious above all things
2- Eat when hungry, sleep when sleepy, play when bored
3- Affection is given and received on my terms and only mine
4- Show displeasure clearly.
5- NO
6- Demand the things you want. If they aren’t given, demand them again, but louder this time.
7- If you are touched when you don’t want to be, say so. If they continue to touch you, make them bleed.

(via never-seen-a-nevergreen)

rainymeadows:

somethingpointy:

Vampire doctors that can smell if you have a blood disease.

Werewolf therapy animals for sick kids.

Nature sprite and nymph nurses that always make sure people have pretty flowers to brighten up their white rooms.

Fauns that go around and sing and dance for patients so that they smile.

Nice monster hospitals would be amazing

Someone write a book about this.

(via emeroo)

shinymaplesquid:

shinymaplesquid:

I just got a wrong number text from a stranger that said: “hey can we use ur pool there’s a moose in ours”

#welcometocanada

I’ve never received such a funny text in my life I can’t breathe

UPDATE:
I told them “yes if you send a pic” & they sent me tHIS

image

(Source: pancakessexual, via never-seen-a-nevergreen)

fatted:

Family: *says something racist*
Family: *says something sexist*
Family: *says something homophobic*
Family: *makes fun of people with tattoos*
Family: *tells you why you’re bad at life*
Family: why don’t you wanna spend time with us?

(via emeroo)

Toad Words

ursulavernon:

Frogs fall out of my mouth when I talk. Toads, too.

It used to be a problem.

There was an incident when I was young and cross and fed up with parental expectations. My sister, who is the Good One, has gold fall from her lips, and since I could not be her, I had to go a…